40 Years! Are you kidding?

Nope. I am not kidding. That is how long it took me to find our First Mate from my boating days onboard our 112' submarine chaser, Sondra II, in the '70s. For those of you have not read my book, Stuart West was the first brave (although naive) soul to sign up just days before we set sail for Key West from Halifax.

Here is the excerpt from the book.

THE MOTLEY CREW

Mahone Bay, Nova Scotia

August 1978

“There are three sorts of people; those who are alive,

those who are dead, and those who are at sea.”

-LD CAPSTAN CHANTEY ATTRIBUTED TO ANACHARSIS, 6TH CENTURY BC

OUR motley crew miraculously began to pop up out of

nowhere. First, it was a former junior-level schoolteacher from

Ontario who, bored with kids, was looking for something to

shake him up a bit. Stuart simply appeared at the bottom of the

gangplank early one morning. Once invited aboard, he walked

up the plank with purpose in his stride, accompanying his

introduction with a convincingly firm handshake undoubtedly

designed to offset his lack of experience. I studied him as he

approached. His body was sort of non-descript—not tall, not

particularly muscular or fit as indicated by his slight paunch, but

his overall appearance was certainly striking. Great shocks of

Irish-red, shaggy hair and complete facial ‘fro the texture of a

Brillo pad juxtaposed his Ralph Lauren fashion statement.

Overall, there was a softness about him that I liked—slow-

moving mannerisms, quiet speech, full lips that smiled easily and

green eyes that listened. I had a feeling he would be good for

David. Over coffee, we discussed the fact that no pay would be

involved, that it would simply be room, board and uncharted

excitement in exchange for work. We took him on, and because

he was a guy and this was the '70s, he was instantly made First

Mate. I didn’t like it but decided that David’s decision was a

means of making Stu feel welcome and important. For once

in my life, I kept my mouth zipped because I knew from the

racing scene that crew status changed like poll positions.

Stuart stayed with us for 4 years and became a great asset to the small team of 3 by the time we reached our destination. Thank god, cause a crew of 3 is a bit scarce for a 112 footer! We left Mahone Bay, Halifax, knowing nothing about going to sea - and I mean absolutely nothing - and we arrived in Key West, about a month later, seasoned sailors. It was not a nautical school for the weak at heart. 

Eventually, things started going south and Stuart decided to bail on a day that I was not present. No forwarding address and no memory of his last name were left behind. I mean, who uses last names unless you have to?

And do you think I or any of the crew or acquaintances from those years could remember it? 

So, 40 years ticked by. 

About a month ago, on my author's Facebook page, he popped up! And yesterday, we met up with a big hug in a little town in Ontario halfway between each of our homes. He is happy, healthy, successful in the education field and retired, spending his days traveling when possible. It was so darned good to see him and to share our common stories and have some belly laughs. 

Moral of the story - get the last name!

So You Want to Write a Novel?

You have been dreaming of writing a memoir of your amazing life or a fictional novel of a great story that has been living actively in your mind for ages. And, you can't help but dream of the nice little profit on the sales that will pay for your holiday. Just a few grand - well, maybe five. After all, it is a great story!

So, full of enthusiasm, you start bangin' it out. The first chapter just bursts out of you, but you decide to hold back from sharing it with your published writer friend until you have a few more. You just write it the way it flows to the keys, figuring it is bound to work. Finally, half a dozen chapters are ready. You email them to your friend.

Days go by with no response. You send a nudge. Finally, a week later, there it is in your inbox. You're on your mousse faster than a fruit fly to red wine and your eyes land on a first sentence that reeks of bad news  -

"I'm going to be frank with you." 

And on it goes, telling you that your story is written in the wrong person  (whatever the hell that means). Then, he drops the big bomb asking -

"Why, in your opinion, is your story worth telling?" 

Isn't that bloody obvious?

You close your computer a bit too hard, gather up your notes in an unorganized way, pour a stiff one, light up a spliff and turn on Netflix - for six months.

Then a google search cautiously begins and you take a stab at changing from the 3rd person to the first.

"Better,' he writes, "but you still have not found your voice. You're all over the place."

"Fuck it. This is no fun."

Then you go through what most first-time writers experience - you poke at it occasionally. One day, out of the blue, you realize that you've found the elusive voice. You are hooked. Hours, months, years are spent in cafes, wine bars, libraries ... writing, writing, writing.

Nearly half a decade later, you are finished. And, it is actually a pretty good book!

Then comes the time to decide whether to self-publish or to look for an agent who loves your book and will get you signed up with a publishing house. It seems to make sense to self-publish as that is all the rage in the industry now and you have more control bla bla bla.

You self-publish on Amazon - easy and cheap.

A couple of years later, you are tired of Amazon taking such a big chunk, of the low sales, of the competition, of the inability to enter prestigious contests. You decide to go to a  prestigious Lit Festival and pay for time with a gal who will teach you how to pitch an agent and then you spend 15 minutes each with three agents. 

"Is that your book on the table? You self-published it? No, no and no. I can't help you."

All three of them say the same damn thing!

Guess what. Agents and publishers won't touch a self-published author - something to do with the fact that you own the rights ... You are on your own, baby until you sell 10,000 copies.

WHAT?!

Partly out of desperation and partly out of being conned, you sign up to a couple of bullshit on-line workshops on how to make your book a "Best Seller" - producing nothing but anxiety and a hole in your pocket. Then, out of sheer stupidity, you take a wack at producing your own audiobook. Now the hole is a whole leg missing in your pants.

See where this is going?

Moral of the story? Research online on how to write a good story first. There are rules. Then, after a qualified editor has gone through it, send it to agents who have published books similar to yours. Attend Lit Festivals . . . . . . . .

Good luck!